girl talk

Let's be honest:  the Western fascination with the Middle East has mostly to do with women's clothing.  I'll confess that before coming here, I felt slightly concerned about how I would dress, whether I would be a second-class citizen, whether I'd even be safe here as a blonde American woman.  As you may remember from an earlier post, the irony that I have undergone one of the biggest assaults to femininity and then came to a place where Westerners generally think women are victims of their culture was not lost on me.  And so, in the past 2 weeks, I've made it my mission to speak to as many women here as humanly possible.

The first two local women I was fortunate enough to speak with were on my second full day in the UAE.  Both of them were wearing a black abaya (all black, loose-fitting garments that go to the floor, along with a head covering so only the face is shown), so I maneuvered myself to strike up a conversation.  The intricate beading on their abayas was eye-catching but also a shock.  I had been under the assumption that traditional garments are plain, simply a shield that hides any reference to femininity.  But, here in the UAE, nothing could be further from the truth.  M's abaya had small sparkling black crystals all over her shoulders and upper body.  The effect was like twinkling stars in a dark night sky as she moved under flourescent office lights.  L's abaya had large black beads encrusted into a flower-like pattern on dolman sleeves;  they were edged in tiny golden beads.  As we chatted, both women seemed quite friendly so, after some internal debate, I decided to be just me:  I complimented young M on the beautiful beadwork of her abaya.  Instantly, her lips curled into a smile and she blushed.  Her eyes registered pride and gratitude as she giggled.  She thanked me in a whisper.  I abruptly realized that genuine compliments are as welcome here as anywhere else.

So, I later told L the beading on her abaya was lovely.  Her face also broke into a broad smile.  The ice now broken, we ventured into a rather lengthly discussion of abayas, current fashion and shoes, prompted by L's electric blue platform heel peeking out from the folds of black.  She told me that the choice to wear the abaya was as much a choice as an American woman's choice to wear pants or a short skirt.

"You chose to wear this suit today," she said, gesturing toward my conservative black pants suit.  "It is exactly the same for us.  It is our choice to wear the abaya."

And thus began my education.  In the UAE, Emirati women wear the abaya as a symbol of their status in society.  Because Emiratis make up a relatively small percentage of the population, especially in the largest cities, the abaya (and burqua, which completely covers the face) is a clear way of demonstrating that a woman is a native Emirati.  In sharp contrast to what we generally believe in the West, here the abaya is a status symbol, worn with the pride of culture and tradition.

Beyond the choice to wear an abaya itself, its embellishment is a form of personal expression and taste.  I've been astonished at the range of beading, embroidery, sequins and silk screening I've seen.  The designs are truly beautiful - the colors more rich and eye-catching because they are always contrasted against black.  I've seen everything from black-on-black beaded designs to colorful combinations of beading and embroidery.  One woman had a truly breathtaking embroidered flower design in a variety of pinks, fuschia and purple hues on the neck and chest of her abaya.  Her fuschia lipstick matched perfectly.  Another woman had large peacock feathers that appeared to be silk-screened on the sleeves of her garment; the blue and green circles of each feather were accented in sequins.  Just today I saw crocheted flowers encircling the ends of sleeves;  another woman's garment had a black-on-black embroidered design with an occasional dangle of four purplish-black beads across the pattern.  I've been told that the latest fashion is shorter, with or without a lace hem, the better to display eye-catching shoes.  Nowhere is this more evident than the mall, where you see an incredible array of stiletto and platform heels, in every color, pattern and animal print you can imagine, peeking out as they peck across polished marble floors.

One day my colleagues pointed out an older woman in an abaya and head covering as she walked through the offices where we're working.  They wanted me to see her mask but only the black outline of her covered head and shoulders was visible.  At some later point, I saw her again.  She wore a golden mask that appeared to be made of metal - two horizontal strips crossed her face at the level of her eyes and mouth, joined by a thin vertical strip down her nose.  Although the effect was somewhat startling, this too is a status symbol.  The women who wear this mask are descendants of the Sheik.

Just how misinformed we are in the U.S. became clear one day last week when I again wandered out of our office.  Just outside the door, I ran into L.  Her eyes widened in surprise when she saw me.

"Melanie, are you cold?" she asked, eyeing my cream LLBean cardigan, "It is over a hundred degrees outside today."

I chucked but stammered over my next words, "I'm usually cold in air conditioning but...  I, well... also I have to wear long sleeves, you know."

"Wear long sleeves?  Why would you need to wear long sleeves?"  she asked, her eyebrows knotting together.

"I, uh, well, I... well, it's what we learned before we came.  That we need to cover our arms."  Her head cocked to the side.

"I mean, we just need to be respectful.  And cover our elbows, our knees, you know..." I said, feeling warm.

"Who told you you needed to dress this way?" she demanded.

"Well, I, um... well, it was part of our training.  You know, before we came.  About adapting to the culture in the UAE," I said.

"You're kidding," she laughed, "it's not like this is...  is... Saudi Arabia, you know.  You want to wear the short sleeves, you wear the short sleeves."

The malls contain numerous stores dedicated to selling abayas.  Our translator, a beautiful young Emirati woman with sparkling eyes and a wide smile, explained to me that it is important to find a good tailor.

"You see these?" she asked, pointing to small jewel-toned crystals on her abaya, no bigger than the tip of a ballpoint pen. "If it is a good tailor, these do not come off in the wash.  If they come off, you find another."  Then she laughed.

S explained that when she goes to the tailor, she describes what she wants in terms of cut - the fullness through the body, whether the waist is nipped or full, how large the sleeves are, the length of the hem - and any ideas about decoration.  Then, the tailor will show samples and customize the final garment specifically for her.  Abayas can range in price from very cheap (poor quality) to extremely expensive, even thousands of dollars.

I've had one opportunity to wear an abaya since I've been in the UAE:  when we visited the Grand Mosque in Abu Dhabi, women were required to put on an abaya and cover the hair.  The fabric felt soft and flowing and, dare I say, extremely feminine.  The soft fabric flows around your legs and arms as you walk and it feels protective.  Like I could see out but others couldn't really see me.  I could definitely relate to being in control of what parts of my body were visible to strangers and which were not, especially after spending so much energy dealing with the physical aftermath of cancer.  The abaya was most certainly hot, especially over jeans, so I can't recommend it as an alternative clothing choice in extreme desert temperatures.  But, I did not feel oppressed, constricted or demeaned in the least.  And now, with the benefit of hindsight, it seems so laughably simplistic that I ever thought there was only one reason to wear an abaya or that the reason might be the same across the Middle East.  It is a complete paradigm shift to realize that, in the UAE, the abaya might just be one of the most powerful symbols of feminine choice there is.  #ibmcsc uae

al ain zoo

Since today was TGIT (thank God it's Thursday), after work we decided to go to the zoo.  It was hot, muggy and a sandstorm had just passed through.  Interestingly, it turns out women need to dress "respectfully"at the zoo and I had some question as to whether I actually was, since I was wearing a lace t-shirt that not only was short sleeved but revealed skin to the shoulder.  Talk about being self-conscious!  And I thought I brought the most conservative clothes I could possibly find!  Was that giraffe staring at me?

The 9 of us that made the trek were quite obviously part of the exhibits for most of the locals.  We do tend to stick out a bit when we go places (understatement).  We were also followed by a security guard throughout the visit, but we're kinda getting used to that too.  All the animals looked about as hot as I was - the white tiger was eating a snack when we arrived, then he went and drank at his pool for a long time, then just plopped himself right down in it.  I so could've done that too.

Here are some animal photos for both my children's classes - I know they've been working on learning about animals so here are a few different (and common) ones:

Gazelle

Nubian ibex

Chital axis deer

Barbary sheep

African wild dog

Meerkat

White African tiger

Sleepy lion

African spurred tortoise

Leopard

Gemsbok

Giraffe

There was a terrific bird of prey show, where trainers displayed the meat-in-midair catching of various eagles, vultures, kites, and hawks.  It was quite well done.  We spoke to one of the trainers afterward about falconry, which is a historic local sport here.  He told us that the royal family owns almost 1000 falcons and if you get one that has a certificate that it is from the family, the bird would be worth around 60,000 dirhams (roughly $15,000 US).  Apparently the royal family employs about 200 caretakers for their falcons.  He said you can buy regular falcons for around 15,000 dirhams (roughly $3,200 US).   #ibmcsc uae

trainer and owl

trainer and falcon (notice the hood, apparently they don't allow them
to fly until winter)

trainer and eagle

what's that for?

Ok, now I'm gonna talk potty.  That's right.  Potty.

I suppose it won't surprise you too much if you've known me longer than about 5 minutes that this was the very first photo I took on UAE soil.  I had just walked a looooong trek from the plane, after a loooooong flight from Atlanta, and up an escalator with Karen (my travel buddy and teammate) when we spied the ladies' room.

The reason the potty is so interesting to me is that it's one of the major ways that I'm reminded several times a day that American culture is just weird.  Even when I was young and we went to England, I used to think it was so funny that European bathrooms had bidets, when it is the U.S. where BO is so taboo.  Americans get a whiff of someone that isn't minty fresh and oh my goodness...  you'd think the olfactory assault is intended as an individually targeted affront.  For those of a certain age, I'm compelled to remind you of the Seinfeld BO episode.  Seriously a classic, but it highlights a key American oddity:  how is it that a culture so hyper-obsessed with cleanliness just has thin-and-often-translucent tissue available in the potty?

And then I came to the UAE.

Here, all the (ladies') bathrooms have an actual hose with a sprayer at the end, just like the one on your kitchen sink for washing dishes or vegetables or the sink.  Well.  After unknotting my brain from the mere contemplation of the thing, my reaction was "yeah, that's going to be a mess," and I had a vision of myself, juggling a stuck sprayer and basically having my own personal typhoon in the stall.  So.  Not.  Happening.  

Ah, but I'm the curious sort.  And, I'm reminded that there is a strange little device in the potty several times a day.  So eventually my curiosity reached a boiling point.  I had a little side convo with Imane (our team facilitator and my primary informational source for all brain-knotting questions) concerning the logistics and usage of said device.  I probed with the most burning questions.  Requested follow-up information.  Walked through the project steps, requested confirmation.  Considered stakeholders.

So, for several more visits to the scene of project completion, I continued to look, consider, and mentally walk through my strategy.  Task analysis.  Risk consideration.  Contingency identification.  Finally, I took the matter into my own hands and, you'll be pleased yet relieved to know, emerged not only triumphant at my successful project execution but without the telltale signs associated with personal typhooning.

So, in line with effective completion of any project, here are some lessons learned:

1.  That is a firm spray.
2.  Sometimes the water is COLD.
3.  Spraying may be a better wake up mechanism for the late afternoon slump than a bucket of espresso or running from a herd of stampeding camels.
4.  Lesson #3 is especially true in the case of Lesson #2.
5.  If you don't notice paper isn't available post spray, it may lead to a cascade of different problems.

And, of course, the most important lesson of all:  Americans are so weird.  #ibmcsc uae

 

where's leo the lobster? #7

Where's Leo the Lobster?

He's hangin' out on a pile of menus at a Lebanese restaurant!
(I told you everybody's getting into this - I was merely an observer for this one.  LOL)

corporate social responsibility: about the project

Around all the fun we're having (!), we're actually here to do two pretty serious projects.  I may have mentioned earlier that the 11 of us are split into 2 project teams:  my team is doing a corporate social responsibility strategy and the other subteam is doing a knowledge and data management project.  Both teams have the same client, Al Ain Municipality, which is the local government here in Al Ain.  It's shocking to realize that tomorrow marks the halfway point for both our projects.


So what is corporate social responsibility (CSR)?

The simple answer to this question is that CSR is the voluntary engagement in environmental and social problems by corporations, who collaborate with the public sector.  As an example, the program that brought me to UAE - Corporate Service Corps - is one of IBM's CSR initiatives.  It meets the criteria for CSR because IBM provides resources (people, money) to emerging economies to provide solutions for community problems.  Both the local community and IBM realize benefits - emerging economies get the benefit of IBM skills, experience and solutions and IBM develops leadership skills for its employees and finds new markets.  It's a win-win situation.  CSR has become very prominent among large companies as both the public and private sector has realized that complex environmental and social issues require a collaborative approach.

What's interesting in our particular situation is that the local government wants to develop their own CSR strategy.  In most of the world, multinational and other corporations hold the CSR strategy, the resources, and the initiatives that they then take to disadvantaged parts of the world.  Going back to the Corporate Service Corps program, the program and resources belong to IBM and the program is executed in places like Tanzania, Philippines, India, Mexico, etc.

However, this model of CSR doesn't really apply in the Middle East - here, countries like the UAE have plenty of resources (particularly funding).  Unlike other emerging economies, Middle Eastern governments are able to develop their own CSR strategies, create programs and other initiatives and then provide their own funding.  They may (or may not) engage the private sector to help.  In one local CSR example, the Sheik of Dubai created a program called Dubai Cares, in which the royal family provided money that provides quality early education programs for over 7 million children in 28 countries.  Dubai Cares does engage private companies to assist with Dubai Cares, so this initiative does meet globally-accepted definitions of CSR.  But, most common definitions of CSR do not apply very well to Middle Eastern government entities, so this region is redefining social responsibility initiated from the public sector.

The project I'm on will help our client develop the strategy that governs their local CSR work.  It will help them identify projects in line with the new strategy, better understand CSR projects already in progress and identify new initiatives they may not have thought about yet.  With a strategy in place, they will be better prepared to take control of their own destiny and engage the private sector in meaningful ways that are relevant to them.

It's really a tremendous project - hugely compressed timeframe and an international team in a foreign place.  Aside from all the incredible things I've learned from my teammates, I've learned so much already about what's going on in cities worldwide to promote things like human rights, fair labor practices, environmental sustainability, community involvement and fair operating practices.  I'll also say that the U.S. is definitely not in a leadership position for CSR practices - that becomes abundantly clear when you research what places like Melbourne (Australia), Calgary (Canada), Curitiba (Brazil) and even Cardiff (Wales) are doing, especially in the area of environmental sustainability.

We've still got a ton of work to do but this project definitely speaks to my idealistic, altruistic self - I think she's been sitting in a dark closet for a while now.  So nice to get out and see the sunshine!  

Next week will be super-busy with multiple presentations and workshops, since we've now completed all the background research and will get into the heart of our engagement.  Watch this space for more updates!  #ibmcsc uae

where's leo the lobster? #6

Where's Leo the Lobster?

He's hiding behind my computer at work!

Vblog Series: Meet the Team

A major part of the fun being in the UAE is the fact that the entire team comes from somewhere different.  The 11 of us represent Colombia, Germany, India, Canada, US, China and Japan so I'm having a grand time learning about all of our countries and the varying perspectives of the rest of my team about the UAE.

Soooo, I thought it would be fun for you (and my children's classes at school) to get a little taste of that too.  Thus, I present my video blog series Meet the Team.  First up is Stephan, our laugh-a-minute wild man and only European.  When we were on our dhow trip, Stephan started whipping out duct tape, rope and an unbelievable number of supplies from his backpack, promptly earning him the nickname German McGyver.  Here's Stephan..... (and take a look behind him, where you can see lots of locals walking through the mall!)  #ibmcsc uae

more local food!

Lunch!

Ah, food.  I'm delighting in the Middle Eastern food, so I thought I'd show you a few more things I've been eating.  This photo was Sunday's lunch in the hotel.  From about 10 o'clock to 1 o'clock on the plate is a Mediterranean herb mixed salad with arugula, local herbs that apparently don't grow anywhere else, tomato, red onion, pomegranate seeds and balsamic vinaigrette.  Being a seasoned vegan, I took a gigantic bite, only to find that it punched my nose in an explosion that only can be described as a combination of eucalyptus, rosemary and pepper.  Every bite made me cough until I figured out that I needed to combine it with something else more bland... like the herbed roasted potatoes and olives on the right side of the plate or the hummus at 6 o'clock.  Tabbouleh (7 to 9 o'clock) made up the rest of my happy veggie plate and at the upper left you can see a veggie samosa.  Yum!  The local diet is heavy on Indian food due to all the ex-pats, which is just fine with me.

Fresh date

The next interesting snack I had was a fresh date - who knew?  Date palms grow all over the place here (well, ok, all over the place on date farms) and one of my teammates found these somewhere at the client office and brought them back to the conference room we've taken over for the duration of our stay.  Fresh dates are surprisingly crunchy and really sweet.  When you break them open, they're cottony.  My mouth felt like it had been dehydrated on contact, so although it was interesting to see and taste one, I'll stick to dried dates over fresh.

And, last but not least, Pappa Roti.  This is a baked bun that is apparently getting popular in Europe, Asia and locally in the UAE.  Imane, our local facilitator, decided she simply must have one right now, so several of us followed her lead and went along.  Well, I'm sure you can guess where this is going.  As you can see here, it's a circular bun that's kind of a cross between a donut and popover.  What's amazing about it is the smell (think:  hot off the presses donut with buttery caramel) and the texture:  inside it's light and airy, along the lines of a croissant, with a crisp sugary crust like angel food cake.  Mine was topped with drizzles of caramel - other teammates had blueberry syrup or plain.  Of course, I followed Imane again (a tiny thing who, I might add, could blow over in a strong gust) and ordered a Pappa Roti tea, which turned out to be filled with milk and sugar.  Well, good thing I enjoyed crunching that sugary crust because the darn thing mixed with the tea became a brick in my poor veggie tummy and I ended up spending the rest of the night drinking ginger tea in my room and skipping dinner so I'd feel better.  Vegan, it most certainly was not.  But, I'm being flexible these days and trying to live in the moment and try stuff so I have no regrets.  When in the Arab world, do as they do....  at least once.  Good thing is that Pappa Roti reaffirmed my veganism (along with the camel market).  #ibmcsc uae

notes from home

I've been chatting with Steve and the kids almost daily, sometimes more, via Skype.  Last week all 3 of them seemed really out of sorts:  Steve looked exhausted and stressed, Sophie was crying a lot and Alex ended up spending 2 days off school, one of which was a Day Of Puking.  Steve definitely got the full experience of working motherhood with a bang, including every mom's favorite, drop everything because a child is sick.  I had one night where I felt really low after seeing them struggling so much.

I spoke with them most recently this morning (for me, last night for them) and was amazed at the change.  Steve seemed almost back to normal and was directing Alex in finishing homework, dashing around the kitchen fixing dinner and trying to get Sophie to stop whining at him.  So, normal day in the life... of most mommies.  He openly admitted to me on Sunday that working and dealing with the house and children is really hard.  I tried not to sound too terribly smug when I retorted that I had some awareness of that fact.

So, I am able to see some significant progress toward the goals I had for this trip away.  Sophie talked to me for a little while - in the past couple of days, her articulation had become more precise and she looks like she's had a growth spurt - and then announced she was pretty much done and wanted to hang up.  Alex took a little coaxing away from what Daddy was telling him to do to say hi to me.  And Steve looked more confident and relaxed in his parental duties for the evening.  Seeing this, I felt grateful and encouraged that this trip is absolutely everything I had hoped it would be - a bonding opportunity for my family and some much-needed mommyhood R&R, plus a new career challenge for me.  All seems right with the world, even from half a world away.  #ibmcsc uae

where's leo the lobster? #5

Where's Leo the Lobster?

Riding a camel in Dubai!
(this was Felipe and Ritesh's idea)

If you're wondering why in the world I keep posting photos of this stuffed lobster, you can get the scoop here

week 2 begins

After our weekend adventures in Abu Dhabi and Oman, Sunday morning brought the start of the work week.  In the UAE, Friday and Saturday make up the weekend while Sunday through Thursday are work days.  I've found it incredibly confusing for Monday to actually be Sunday, Friday to be Thursday.  Add to that the fact that often when I talk to Steve, Alex and Sophie it's a different day altogether for them and the days here jumble together in a mass.   I continuously find myself having to talk through what day it is, like so:  Ok, I've worked one day already, I talked to Steve this morning, Sunday, and it really feels like Tuesday but it's actually Monday.  Quite confusing!

Sunday, Sept 23 began our second week in UAE.  It was highlighted by an afternoon visit to the IBM Dubai office, where we met with some of the local team and then had an Arabic dinner in Dubai.  #ibmcsc uae

CSC UAE Team 2
Felipe (Columbia), Faiz (India), Stephan (Germany), Catherine (China)
Back row: Tahir (Canada), Sheela (India), Karen (US), Paul (US), Melanie (US), Ritesh (India), Kanako (Japan)

Where's Leo the Lobster? #4

Where's Leo the Lobster?

On a dhow
(rhymes with cow! a traditional Arabian boat)
in Dibba, Oman

AND.... he's also diving on the Musandam, Oman
(I'll note here that my entire team is really getting into the Leo photos!
This one was created by Ritesh)

camel souk, al ain

At the edge of the desert, behind a mall, is Al Ain's camel market (souk), where hundreds of camels, sheep, goats, other animals and traders create a bustling glimpse of traditional life in the Arab world.  Literally hundreds of animals are cramped behind steel bars, grouped by size and whether they are intended for meat or milk.  Men in white thobes and colorful headgear mill about as camels roar like bears across the souk.  The smell of excrement, hay and animal hangs in the steamy air.

We rounded a corner to an extraordinary sight:  a camel dangling mid-air in a sling over a truck.  He moaned deeply, his crooked teeth protruding from his large snout, as he was lowered and his nose cracked against the truck.  Men yammered in Arabic and stared at our motley group until we hurried from the dusty souk and into the gleaming coolness of the mall.  #ibmcsc uae

diving in dibba, oman

Large dhows beside small fishing boats

The small port at Dibba, Oman contains a variety of small motor boats and the larger dhow, or traditional boats, used for sailing and diving excursions on the Musandam coast.  Just 28 miles away lies Iran.  As you look across the landscape, pastel stucco buildings are flanked by grey concrete structures under construction, as far as you can see.  An entire city is springing from the ground simultaneously.

There is a small border checkpoint (but not formal border crossing) at Dibba as you cross from UAE to Oman.  Coffee skinned men with foreboding eyes beneath thick black eyebrows peer into your car, glance at your passport, and wave you onward.  In the older section of the small town, only men appear on the streets.  Their colorful head scarfs shield the burning sun.

View of port looking toward Dibba

Small village with mosque

We walked across a small fishing area to find our dhow for our dive trip.  It was at the end of a row of dhows, so we followed our South African guide Greg as he jumped from one to the next.  Cushions and pillows, situated around the perimeter of green artificial grass carpet, invited us to relax.  As our dhow slipped out of the port, we passed the varying beige colors the rocky mountains behind a small mosque and several low stucco houses, highlighted by the yellow rays of the sun.

The turquoise water of the Dibba port turned deep blue as we entered the Arabian Gulf.  Rocky limestone mountains met the sea throughout the entire journey.  Here and there a stunted tree defied the parched earth.

About an hour later, a blue inlet cut a neat circle into the mountain range;  at the far side was a small white sand beach and beyond it, a handful of concrete block shacks nestled into the mountain.  White crabs scurried across the sand and shot into holes.  A sea turtle glided through the shallow water.  Later, our guide would assert we should not assume the people living here were poor; they could make a couple thousand dollars per day selling tuna and other fish at the local port.  These traditionalists had chosen the simplicity of a life accessible only by boat over the comparatively bustling life of Dibba.

Fishing village at inlet, team learning dive skills near beach

I see Dory! (blue tang)

In this lovely place, we learned simple diving skills:  breathing with a regulator, removing and replacing the regulator, hand signals for communicating, removing water that leaked into the face mask.  Then we rode to the mouth of the inlet for a short dive in waves that bounced us up and down, then crashed against mountain rocks.  Under the thick, salty water, I saw a variety of sea urchins, angelfish, small jellyfish and a blue tang but their colors were muted.  I also saw an abandoned fishing net that looked like an igloo made out of rusted chicken wire - several blue fish swam inside.  It took me a little practice to figure out how to equalize my right ear and to move deeper in the water using full exhalations.   In the end, I managed to dive down about 8 meters.

We returned to port as the sun set.  In the deepening light, men milled about the port and the stench of fish hung in the heavy air.  They stared at us as we gathered our belongings and hurried back to our vans for the 3 hour ride back to Al Ain.  #ibmcsc uae

Learning dive skills, L to R:  Felipe (Columbia), Stephan (Germany),
Ritesh (India), me (US), Sheela (India)

Getting my certificate from instructors Greg (L) and Ryan (R),
both from South Africa

Corporate Service Corps UAE Team 2